Guess wat jus a few week so many thing jus happen..I didn't work as i bond de contract and have to pay for 3k...I am stress don know where to find such a amount to pay them? I jus hate living in this world i don know if i am sway or jus the way i do is wrong.I have a bf which don understand mi he don even know wat i wan and wat i need in his life friends are more important, freedom to him is a must...I jus don understand why i do so much thing yet wat i get in return ??? I don know is a right choice to go back to him a not? When ever we quarrel he don even give mi a chance to explain. He said he dote mi but i jus don feel it ...Can someone understand mi?Not i don wan to give him freedom jus tat i scare to lose him again...I wanted to leave him but i jus cant do it is there still love between us ??? I don know i really don know...I am tat type of gal which i will keep things in mind and jus cant let go.. Thing will jus appear in my mind over and over again...Can i jus die and everything will get over?There are jus too many thing i don understand and don get to it ...3 years and we jus cant stable down i found tat i don even understand wat he is thinking rite now?I don think he wan to stable down and get married at the moment...I am tired i wish to sleep longer and i don wish to wake up i hope everything is jus a nightmare...Hope when i wake up tml everything is jus a dream to mi..I am unless i am going to 21 and yet wat i got nothing i am such a loser ...Btw my new friend jus gone she is 18 this year and she got bang by a taxi ...She still have a long way yet she jus leave like this ...I don know her much jus a few talk wit her and i feel so sudden when she is gone...BTW RIP Gal ...